I'm bitchy and whiny and I hate being sick forever! I am taking a break from blogging again..too much shit going on...anyways if anyone needs to get ahold of me email me at jayah_o@msn.com

ciao kids

Ok so yeah Brad Pitt is in Winnipeg and everyone had gone bananas.

Onto other things...I still haven't found my cousin's phone number. Seems like my family has been slacking off in keeping contact with each other again. TYPICAL...I'm mot the only one.

I spent a wonderful day with my little monsters. We goofed off and cleaned up the living room together. WE MADE FORTS! I hauled out all the extra blankets in the house..they loved it. I think I started something BAD! :P oh well. They are only young once..and like Daytripper says..memories are cool..I want my kids to have some good ones :lol:

My friend had her baby today..one more to go..next year one more as well. She had a girl and named her Marissa..I can't wait to see her and the baby! I'M TOO SICK TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL! DAMMIT!

My siamese fighting fish is being very odd again..freak. Only animals we ever get are freaks.

I guess I am going home for the holidays so I just might get a good party for my birthday! SWEET!

I was reading sweetsue's blog and she was talking about memories. That got me thinking about mine. I guess the last few days have been kinda shitty for me and I was having a hard time figuring out why.

I got it all figured out now. I miss Darcy. He was my cousin. He died. He was just a bit older than me. I didn't do anything for his birthday this year. I didn't call his sister. I'm sure she wonders if I fell off the face of the earth.

He was a punk. Covered in tattoos..he did some on himself too. I wish he would have tattooed me before he died. I miss our arguments (all in fun) and I miss his honesty. Told lots of lies too..I always knew too. I would laugh at him.

I remember when we were 16 and he was living with my parents and I.  He was an alcoholic..who was broke. He came into my room and asked me for my babysitting money so he could buy a six pack. Even though we were only 16 we never got id'd. I think the tattoos helped :wink: I had to pay my dad to drive me to a rave on the weekend and I could not give him any money. Besides that I didn't want him to drink anymore. I told him sorry . He actually cried. He sat on the floor beside my bed and shook and cried and talked to me till the next morning. I still went to school. I brought him with me. We had a good day. My bus driver let him ride with me even though it was not allowed. She still drives bus..actually with my dad...lol.

I am sad Darcy that you can't see my kids.. and that you will never have any.
I am sad that I wasn't nicer to you. I never spent enough time with you either.

I do know you knew how much I loved you though..you told all your friends..who told me. That still warms my heart! Big tattooed pierced bikers telling me with tears in their eyes so taught me not to judge on appearances.  Even more than you did. You experienced alot and shared it with me so I would never had to do all those things myself.

I suppose he was like a brother to me..I don't really know I have no siblings.

I miss him alot right now..I guess he was one of the few who accepted me just the way I am. We 3 , Darcy, Shauna and I were the ones in the family that got along the best...among 60+ cousins. We were the black sheep...only two remain.

I really need to call her..I feel stupid though..so much time had passed since the last time I talked to her...what do I say?

How can two days be so freakin different? I woke up really early yesterday to a soogy son. I changed him and let him sleep with me till 11 am. My daughter woke up at 9 and she kept herself busy AND out of trouble.

Today....NO SUCH LUCK! HOLY HELL! I woke up to the house vibrating around me. I read a book before crashing last night in which there was a volcano eruption so of course first thought was that. I quickly realised that that wasn't the case! DUH! I live in the praries! The ruckus was coming from my offspring. Yelling, crying, whining and possibly some laughing too. WHAT A COUPLE OF FREAKS!

So yesterday I took the day away from the computer to spend time with my creatures and read stories and do fun stuff for the whole day. You would think they would be happier today but NOOOOOOO! It's even worse. I hate this time of year when it comes to my kids. They are bored and cause trouble because they can't play outside as much. I need a round padded room and some padded helmets!  I would go play in there for sure. Might even stay in there :D

So today I think once we have lunch I am dressing the kids warmly and sending them outside anyways..even if it is raining a bit and its cold. They need fresh air! I need quiet!

Ciao kids!

I have a kidney stone..I gotta lay down...will fix comments later..back soon I hope.

Wating for the drugs to kick in..no, not weed.

Ok going to pass out now...

later...

I guees we aren't moving right now. We decided the place we were looking at it too expensive for what we get. Not that we can't afford it..just that it needs a ton of work and there are virtually no outbuildings. On 18 acres..thats lame. Not even a fucking garage!..Plus I told my hubby no more babies until we know what we are doing. The new place was only a three bedroom, we have 4 here.

We are still going to keep an eye on the property..till he sells it. I'm interested to see what he gets for it. Some people live in a place so long they see memories as worth...they don't see their house for the pile of shit it really is. :D

So we have decided to finish all the crap that needs to get done here and stay here at least till spring. Too many things happening all at the same time. I hate that! NEW JOB, NEW HOUSE and to add to the madness he wants to have another  baby.

He's fucking out to lunch on that one. I'm not a happy camper when I'm pregnant. Not that I don't like being a mom or even being pregnant for that fact. I just really hate wanting to barf my guts out daily for at least 6 months. I can't do a damn thing. No dishes..ok wait I can still do laundry..but I have to use unscented detergent. NO smelly people around, good or bad! I hoped last time that is was just a first time thing..but when I was pregnant with my son..it lasted longer...even though it wasn't as severe.

Just wake me up when its time to push..I'm good at that part! :P

At least now I can take a break from all the cleaning and re-organizing. This will be the first time since we got married that we will spend Christmas twice in a row in the same house. Nope..that a lie..we did spend two at this house we used to rent. That was the year I was pregnant with my daughter. I forgot because we trade off years to visit with my parents.  One year we go to Alberta one year they come here to Manitoba. Works out great and no one gets left out!

Well I'm off now..going to go feed my little creatures..they are starving apparently...like I never freakin feed them or something!

Why do I have a funny feeling we will still be moving?! :evil:

I just finished smoking a joint and now I'm listening to music. This music made me think of a friend. This friend is a musician. They like the song playing on the radio right now. In fact this person sent it to me to hear it.

This friend makes me tingle in few choice places...so I got to thinking a bit. I realised that the people I "like" or "want" are Musicians 9 times out of 10. The last person I was with..was in a band that was well known. It was great. My husband is a musician too. Ok not a Rock Star type or anything...more Orchestra style. Several instruments. He is a  pretty damn awesome musician too. OK now on to this friend. Another fantastic musician. Really knows the guitar. Wrote something just for me. PLAYED IT FOR ME ON THE PHONE!

I THINK I AM A LIFETIME GROUPIE! HOLYSHIT!

I think I'm in trouble again...what am I going to do?..A year almost to the day of  my last episode like this.

FUCK!

Well today was an interesting day! ...Not really..anyways I made bread..and cinnamon buns..AGAIN!

My daughter was talking to me in the kitchen. She was playing with some fridge magnets. It fell on her toe! OUCH!..WELL HOLY HELL! She screamed so loud I nearly dropped the bread fresh out of the oven.  My son hearing all the commotion came over and asked her where the owie was.  She said her toe. He bent down and kissed her toe and the gave her a huge hug and wiped her tears. He is 2..and he never ceases to amaze me. He drives her mad one minute and the next is comforting her like mom!

The snow is finally melting..should be all gone by tomorrow. I'm off to watch ER and have a bowl..

CIAO KIDS!